1. Participants got a one-day run at the month; thus, they had to come into work on Monday, 4/30, with a clean-shaven face smoother than a baby’s bottom — no shaving sooner!
2. The mustache must be obvious. This meant absolutely no growing of goatees, beards, soul patches, etc. This was Mustache May, after all — not Beardvember, Soul Patch September, or some other haphazard event which permits fur growth on other parts of the face.
3. After 31 consecutive days of glorious growth, photos were taken and our fearless, unflappable coworkers selected the best cookie duster/soup strainer/[insert your favorite mustache euphemism here] based upon their own hairy criteria.
No, this isn’t the photo lineup from the county Sheriff’s office, but rather the final results of our dedicated participants. We insisted on “no smile” photos so as not to sway the results .
That handsome fella in the middle of the right-hand column, John Padlo, received the favor and adoration of his colleagues for best mustache. Our VP, Communications, John Curtis said it best:
“I like the full ‘stache and the corners that extend below the lack of smile. His mustache changes his look the most and transforms lovable John P. from a talented creator to America’s Most Wanted.”
For his effort, Padlo receives bragging rights for 11 months in addition to much-deserved respect from his fellow man.
Congratulations, Padlo, and thank you, participants, for your fortitude. I think I speak for all the ladies in the office when I say I can’t wait for next May!